Funny New Year Quotes

Laugh Your Way Into the New Year With These Funny New Year Quotes

Friends hugging at New Years party
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Every new year brings a chance to mark the passage of time, reflect on the past, and embrace the future, and the New Year's holiday celebrates that opportunity. Some of us party into the wee morning hours, while others struggle to stay awake to watch the clock hands move past twelve; we make resolutions, only to soon break them; we promise to do better, try harder, be better, but oftentimes fall short, or life, itself, gets in the way.

Humor relieves the stress of life and its potpourri of experiences by augmenting the good, helping to heal the inevitable scars of time, and pointing out life's absurdities. Humor allows us to not take ourselves or our lives too seriously. It helps us to see the bigger picture and to develop generosity of spirit not only towards ourselves and our shortcomings but also towards others, which is certainly a good way to start a new year.

Following are some humorous quotes to start your New Year off smiling:

Mark Twain
"New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions."

Brooks Atkinson
"Drop the last year into the silent limbo of the past. Let it go, for it was imperfect, and thank God that it can go."

Bill Vaughan
"Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to."

P. J. O'Rourke
"The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk.

This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to."

Jay Leno
"Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average… which means, you have met your New Year's resolution."

James Agate
"New Year's Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time."

Eric Zorn
"Making resolutions is a cleansing ritual of self assessment and repentance that demands personal honesty and, ultimately, reinforces humility. Breaking them is part of the cycle."

Bill Vaughan
"An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves."

Charles Lamb
"New Year's Day is every man's birthday."

Mark Twain
"New Year's Day now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual."

Judith Christ
"Happiness is too many things these days for anyone to wish it on anyone lightly. So let's just wish each other a bile-less New Year and leave it at that."

"Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits."

Joey Adams
"May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions!"

Oscar Wilde
"Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account."

Robert Paul
"I'm a little bit older, a little bit wiser, a little bit rounder, but still none the wiser."

"A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one Year and out the other."

Leonard Bernstein
"From New Year's on the outlook brightens; good humor lost in a mood of failure returns.

I resolve to stop complaining."

G. K. Chesterton
"The object of a New Year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul and a new nose; new feet, a new backbone, new ears, and new eyes. Unless a particular man made New Year resolutions, he would make no resolutions. Unless a man starts afresh about things, he will certainly do nothing effective. Unless a man starts on the strange assumption that he has never existed before, it is quite certain that he will never exist afterwards. Unless a man be born again, he shall by no means enter into the Kingdom of Heaven."


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Khurana, Simran. "Funny New Year Quotes." ThoughtCo, Dec. 29, 2017, Khurana, Simran. (2017, December 29). Funny New Year Quotes. Retrieved from Khurana, Simran. "Funny New Year Quotes." ThoughtCo. (accessed March 21, 2018).