Memorable Quotes From Tommy Boy

Tickle Your Funny Bone With These Memorable Quotes From Tommy Boy

1995 ShoWest
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Tommy Boy has some knee-slapping funny scenes. One of the funniest scenes in the movie is when Tommy struggles to change his clothes in an airplane restroom. Here are some memorable quotes from Tommy Boy that are guaranteed to make you laugh. The humor may seem unoriginal to some, but Tommy Boy does make the viewer laugh with abandon. Savor the comedy in these memorable quotes from .


  • I can get a good look at a T-bone by sticking my head up a bull's ass, but I'd rather take a butcher's word for it.
  • [hugging a stranger] I passed. I wish we'd known each other... this is a little awkward.
  • God, you're gonna remember this for the rest of your life. Can't believe you've never been cow tipping before.
  • [talking like a toddler] Him too fwaid to get out, he's just a wittle guy.
  • Apparently they give a lot fewer D-pluses than D-minuses. It's not a grade they like to give out.
  • Oh, man, that's cold! I'm a maniac, maniac on the floor. And I'm dancing' like I've never danced before...
  • R.T., I lost my virginity to your daughter, for crying out loud.

Richard Hayden

  • Ugh, I can actually hear you getting fatter.
  • This is like a bad Twilight Zone. I think I'm growing a tumour.

Listen up, you little spazoids. I know where you live and I've seen where you sleep. I swear to everything holy that your mothers will cry when they see what I've done to you.

These shoes are Italian. They're worth more than your life.

Ray Zalinsky
Ted, send over a bottle of bubbly in a bucket of ice and a card. Have the card read, "Tough luck, get drunk on me. Use the bucket to ice down your marbles, Yours, Z."

Ted Reilly
Oh, real good. Real good. I had a kidney removed last April, but I still have the other one.

Kid in Bank
Oh, yeah right. It was some other real fat guy with a tiny head.