The Best 4/20 Weed Jokes and Memes

These jokes and memes come HIGHLY recommended, if you KWIM.

Ah, April 20th... 4/20.... It's the yearly celebration of everyone's favorite illicit (in most states) substance, marijuana. Marijuana. Ganja. Mary Jane... a weed by any other name would smell as... um, pungent? Skunky?

In celebration of nature's favorite psychoactive drug/medicine, and of the hilarious stoners who love it, here's a list of some of the funniest weed-related jokes and memes from around the web. So grab some Cheetos and your best 3-foot bong (What? Doesn't everybody own one?) and get ready for a serious case of the giggles.

How do you know when you are Stoned?

Via Reddit.

Answer: When you are too phoned to stone home.

Why is the roach clip called a roach clip?

Via Distractify.

Answer: Because pot holder was taken.


Recommended: 18 Face Swaps That Gave Us The Giggles (And Nightmares).

How do you get a one-armed stoner out of a tree?

Via Reddit.

Answer: Wave.

What do you get when you eat marijuana?

Via Vibe.

Answer: A pot belly.

What do you call a pot smoker with two spliffs?

Via Heavy.

Answer:  Double jointed.


You might also like: 20 Very Funny April Fool's Day Pranks.

How do you know when you have smoked enough pot?

Via Vibe.

Answer:  When you start looking around for the directions on how to use the lighter.

How do you know you're a pothead?

Via BuzzFeed.

Answer: You studied five days for a urine test.


Here's another fun one: 20 Funny Pics That Will Mess With Your Head.

What do you call a pothead who doesn't inhale?

Via Imgur.

Answer: Mr. President.

How do fish party?

Via Reddit.

Answer: Seaweed.

Why did the pot head plant Cheerios?

Via Tumblr.

Answer: He thought they were donut seeds.


Related Story: The 20 Very Best Art History Snapchats.

MORE Jokes and Memes on Page Two!

What do you call a person who remembers what they did at Woodstock?

Via Nugz.

Answer:  A Liar.

What do you call one bowl between three tokers?

Via Reddit.

Answer:  Malnutrition.


Recommended: The 20 Best Celebrity Memes (So Far!).

What do you call it when a roach ash burns your shirt?

Via Weed Memes.

Answer:  A pot hole!

How do you know you are a true stoner?

Via Weed Memes.

Answer:  When your bong gets washed more than your dishes.

What is Reality?

Via Reddit.

Answer:  An illusion caused by a lack of good weed.


Recommended: Hack Attack! 16 Very Funny Hacked Construction Signs.

What is the difference between a drunk guy and a stoner at a stop sign?

Via Meme Generator.

Answer: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green.

How many potheads does it take to change a lightbulb.

Via Heavy.

Answer: Screw it, we got lighters.


Recommended: 20 of the Funniest People Ever Spotted On A Subway.

How long does it take before a pound of bud goes bad?

Via We Know Memes.

Answer: I don't know! I've never had it longer than an hour!

How do you hide pot from a hippie?

Via Heavy.

Answer: Put it in his work boots.


Related: Funny Fast Food Signs That Aren't Exactly Appetizing.

What is the difference between politicians and stoners?

Via Someecards.

Answer: Politicians don't inhale...they just suck.

Next page: Even more funny weed jokes and memes!

What do you call a stoner that just broke up with his girlfriend?

Via Meme Generator.

Answer: Homeless.


See also: 20 Funny Animals Who Think They're People.

If there are two potheads in the back of a car, then who is driving?

Via Meme Generator.

Answer: The cop.

Why did the stoner cross the street?

Via Vibe.

Answer: His dealer lived on the other side.

How do you hide money from a hippie?

Via Reddit.

Answer: Put it under the soap.


You might also like: 20 Kids Who Are Totally Freaked Out By The Easter Bunny.

How did the pothead burn his ear?

Via Heavy.

Answer: He answered the phone while ironing his clothes.

How do you get an one-armed hippie out of a tree?

Via Imgur.

Answer: Hold out a joint.

Happy 420, everybody! Be safe out there!

NEXT UP: 17 Drunk People Who Got Drawn On By Their So-Called Friends.

With friends like these, who needs enemies! Be careful who you pass out around, friends.